A scientist explained to me why it was difficult to communicate with aliens. “The ones that are easiest to catch are usually starving. And starving aliens are dangerous and violent. So now,” the scientist explained to me, “we make our own ETs. We take alien DNA and genetically engineer it to have a pleasant disposition. As a side-effect of this, the aliens’ skin becomes gray-furred and extremely wrinkly, just like shar peis.”